family abuse

I felt compelled to respond to a comment on facebook a few days ago as domestic violence is a very real problem in our society. However when I mention domestic violence, most of us think it in the direction of women being abused by men, I would like to highlight that the other direction is more common than we know.

Violence from women to men in intimate relationships not only happens but for a number of reasons should be taken very seriously.

Men are brought up to not show that they are suffering and can feel embarrassed at admitting being a victim in any circumstance, let alone having to acknowledge suffering under the abuse of someone they are programmed to provide for an care for.

From my work I can tell you that people mark and bruise in totally different ways – you can exert an amount of force hitting one person who will bruise large and dark and you can hit someone like myself in a similar manor and no marks will show in a matter of minutes. The mistake here is to believe that the marks mean one individual has been “hurt” more than the other. The pain may well be similar at the time of the impact, it is the outcome that visually causes gasps. When I am bruised the dark obvious ones hurt the same as the ones no one notices, however the dark one’s do take longer to heal and desensitise. This seems to totally miss the important point, bruises heal, emotional abuse, that must be a part of it, damages.

Men and women who are abused end up leaving the home and keep a distance. In the case of men, should they return she will claim abuse and get them arrested. In an abusive relationship it is not the abuser who runs away, yet everyone will believe the female who manages to take over the house and still claim the status of “victim”.

I have been happily married for a dozen years so I am not negative about women but the recent events for a friend in a divorce reminded me of ugly times past.

While I may not agree with all of this link, and they do seem to update it from time to time, in my life I have certainly known a female who fits a lot of the content on the page below.